"The Ex Factor."

In Mathematics, you'll see "X" represents the unknown. But, what's truly unknown is that what plus what equals a friendship with an ex-boyfriend ... Have I discovered the unsolvable? Or, is it possible to transform a once-passionate love into something which fits super easily and nice onto the friendship shelf? Could a gal be friends with her ex? Recently, I've found my past maneuvering into the present, which calls for a post!

Patrick ... Remember him, Searchers? The (crazy) ex-boyfriend who's still head-over-heels in love with me, regardless of everything. Well, per a "non-platonic basis", Patrick has requested I see a movie with him some point tomorrow. I wish the whole "Ex Factor" wasn't a major issue and I could casually agree without having these skeptical thoughts. But I simply don't know ... I mean, is this wise?

I question his intentions ... Should I open this door again if I do get a chance?

Patrick's truly manipulating the Friendzone ... However, what am I waiting for? Prince Charming on a horse? Risks are life ... It's how a gal evolves, grows and learns valuable lessons. But, what would I actually learn? Learn I had made a truly terrible mistake while having all my old problems seem more real than ever now? Or, would I learn second chances are vital for having a successful relationship? Would I completely exceed the boundaries of propriety monopolizing such a chance? I know risks are key, but could I be in over my head? Shit. Oh, the questions.

While I think, maybe a Cosmopolitan plus a Scotch equals a friendship with an ex. However, I'm not ready for the validation to lie in that particular genre. I'll get Savannah to come, I could use a wingwoman right about now, or a variable. Advice/Opinions/Thoughts, Searchers? I'm going in. Unarmed, and fully unloaded.

"White Flags."

For years, Bi-Sexuality, Homosexuality, Transsexualism, and those who embrace it have had to literally fight for equality and their rights as human-beings, and everything in regards to acceptance and respect...

...Individuals perpetually frown upon these, which "seem" foreign, other sexual preferences. Admittedly, I'm somewhat a religious gal, but there are those who perpetuate negative stereotypes which make discrimination along with frivolous and unacceptable hate paramount. There are false bottoms and loopholes in the common arguments given by those opposing individuals, but they're hairsplitters. These alities/isms are inevitable. But are bullying and homicide as the end result in somebody's Pursuit of Happiness too?

The Bible states, "If a man lies with a male as with a woman, both have committed an abomination. They shall be put to death; Their blood is upon them." Okay ... Let's talk about Straight Relationships. I've got ex-boyfriends, stuff never worked out there. Fortunately, I was never anybody's Wife and never had to contend with "DIVORCE" in big letters. Would I succumb to being stoned if I had though? No. The Bible states I would, but Divorce's so bottom shelf, paper bag common nobody would care to notice. But at the chance of eternal happiness for a couple, we're belligerently ignorant and condemn it 'cause it's same sex? Shame! I see there isn't any need for ridicule, and we actually should commend all these couples for their LASTING relationships; They're apparently doing something right, I mean c'mon. We drink, smoke, don't love our neighbors ... And that's alright, it's simply who we are. But we're crossing the Bible, which presents a double standard, why does this one thing change the rules?

Let's not forget about how one's brought up, that's crazy important right now. We're not born to hate; We're taught instead. We're exposed to these "Hot Topics" incredibly young ... We are vulnerable to propaganda, where it attaches insanely quick. It's what, from jump, we were grasping. Those are the beginner "lessons" which follow us throughout all our lives. Bit(s) and Piece(s) from our early memories crazily explain our future selves. That's why it's imperative you're diligent when around your children, or around other young ones, the vulnerability level is unbelievable, and it's rare one can evolve out of their caste, seeing things in new lights. Once tainted, it's incredibly difficult to flick the switch over to "accepting and respectful". Just 'cause you think in a particular way, doesn't mean others have to, even when they're your children. We're supposed to give them better than we had, while loving and protecting them. Being positive that they're open-minded is a protection mechanism; Protection from unnecessary discrimination/hate. Sculpt your children into the dazzling soul(s) you wish you could be, so they could in return, sculpt the grandchild(ren). If we could learn the art of evolving, mastering this craft most healthfully, there's so much we'd be above and beyond.

It's truly a scary world. And it's becoming scarier for the L.G.B.T community. It's puzzling, I'll never get why we can't overlook somebody's ethnicity, gender and sexuality but seeing him/her for their personality. You're entitled to an opinion, but while it's generated by prejudice and religion ... It's "ugh", 'cause individuals lack the concept and understanding of that opinion.

Advocating isn't required, but let's try being neutral while I conclude. Love's not a sin, right? Love's great, infinite; If you're happy and you're surrounded by love, where's the sin? We're always growing and evolving, and the man upstairs passed, not only for our mistakes but eternal happiness. It's more challenging for some than for others getting to that place, obviously, but it's fate ... Laugh at the confusion, while knowing that everything happens for a reason and never second guess who you are, where it is you've been and where it is that you're going. "The Search" knows not a single barrier, code, divider, or a limit, and it's open to ALL who truly wish to embark on it...

"I will go down with this ship,

And I won't put my hands up and surrender ...

There will be no white flag above my door,

I'm in love, and always will be ..."

"Out Of The Frying Pan."

The conversations I share among Dolly and Halsey consistently bring me back to the reality ... Specifically those who want us to contend with and live in it. The whole world constantly tells a gal to get real. But what's the fallback when living in reality implies living in fear, pain, or a thousand miles apart from the ones you love? If the particular defense mechanism helps you make it through all of the difficult times, how bad or outlandish could it actually be? Maybe, the truthful reality is that denial is essential...

...Denial : Friend or foe?